Browsing All posts tagged under »mother«

Mandatory Diwali Post

November 13, 2020

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This week crept up on me! In terms of dates and how it is impacting me. I just got back from my fourth Vipassana retreat, and I thought I was ready for anything life threw at me. I guess, not everything. Or maybe I am coping with it to the best of my ability. Last […]

A Journal Entry from 1997

February 27, 2019

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In 1997, I was 16 years old and in grade 11. My mother had “full-blown” Alzheimer’s. She was 46 years old. Writing in my journal was my form of therapy and probably the only productive coping tool I used during these years. I kept a diary from the time I was 13 and stopped writing […]

Dear Mama,

November 14, 2018

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Diwali has come and gone. It was a tough week as usual. I missed you so much. I don’t know how to live my life without you. I don’t know how to be happy on these “days” that are supposed to be about family and togetherness. All I feel is so much pain and darkness. […]

Five Weddings & My Mother’s Dementia

November 26, 2017

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Weddings paralyze me. Recently, I attended a good friend’s wedding in the Washington D.C. area. The morning of the wedding, I sort of had a meltdown. Sid found me in tears, weeping uncontrollably in bed. I realized, perhaps for the first time, the real reason I avoid attending weddings, or have to ply myself with […]

Old Photo, Old Pain

January 23, 2017

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On January 23rd 2001, my mother succumbed to Young Onset Alzheimer's. I recently found my favourite picture in the whole wide world.

A Tale of Gooseberries, Grief & Coping

December 12, 2016

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I walked into the Indian store at Dundas and Hurontario on a wintry Saturday afternoon last weekend. It was a regular day; Sid and I were just going about our business buying things we needed. There was bad Bollywood music playing. It was the complete NRI experience. And then bam, in the fresh fruits and […]

Show and Tell & People l/w Dementia

September 16, 2016

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Yesterday at our group (for people living with Young Onset Dementias – under 65 – and their care partners) we did a round of show-and-tell. We had asked them to bring an object that meant something special to them. Each time one of them spoke, we learned something new about them. Each time they spoke, […]

My 81-year old twin

August 31, 2016

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I met Jean* and her daughter, Alice* for coffee at a nearby Starbucks today. Jean loves the ‘Bucks cappuccino as do I! I saw her sitting at a table while her daughter was getting their beverages. Jean looked so elegant in her black broad-legged linen capris and matching shirt. She wore a loose denim cape […]

Like Mother, Like Daughter

April 3, 2016

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I found this picture of mummy while rummaging through pictures on my recent trip back home. Needless to say, I quiver with emotion when I see a picture of her. But this one makes me vibrate like a washer-dryer on an extra large load. It strikes me like lightning and I want to fall to […]

Whom do you love the most?

March 17, 2016

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Memories of mom – physical and emotional resurface every now and then. Precisely for this reason, I did not look at pictures of her, especially from the times she was sick. One of the major regrets I have is not taking more pictures with her when she was well. We barely have pictures of her […]

Diwali Redefined (For me)

November 1, 2014

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Festivals and me don’t go together. I hate all festivals and in that I do not discriminate. Be it a Christian, Hindu, Muslim, alien festival…I will hate it as much as all the others. My main reasons include seasonal nicety on people’s part, excessive commercialization of holidays, social pressures about personal grooming and visiting others! […]

My Mother’s Barber: Alzheimer’s Diary

October 31, 2014

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They say it takes a village to raise a child. As caregivers, we realize that it takes an entire community to deal with Alzheimer’s. Extended family members, friends, neighbors, healthcare professionals, coworkers, employers, employees, service providers like household help, etc.; a personalized universe of all these groups and more is essential to help a family […]

Why My Resume Says “Full-time Alzheimer’s Caregiver”

September 27, 2014

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Recently, I had to edit my resume for my job hunt. As you may all know, it’s the most boring and mind-numbing task of all. One has to glorify one’s mediocre self. Let’s face it, most of us are not as great as we think we are, or in some cases, as others think we […]

Love in the Time of Alzheimer’s

February 3, 2013

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Sid sent me this article about the reaction of a person living with dementia to an old photograph. The man in this article seems to be in the middle stages of dementia. When he looked at an old photograph of himself with his girlfriend from decades ago, he recognized that the woman in the picture loved […]

That Time of the Year Again

December 17, 2012

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When 2012 began, I had no new year’s resolutions. Or perhaps, none that I said out loud. But I had two. (A) To spend the year working for families affected by Alzheimer’s and (B) Work out at least 3 days a week for a year. I am proud to say that I kept both my resolutions. […]

How to (NOT) Get a Good Husband as a 9-Year Old

April 16, 2012

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Growing up in a Gujarati Jain-Saraswat Brahmin household, my sister and I were exposed to a minimal amount of traditions and festivals. While this practice led us to become broadminded and less religion-governed, it used to be a great source of distress when we were younger. Living in Gujarat, a lot of my classmates were […]

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