A Life-Changing Experience at 34!

Posted on July 17, 2015

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I have always been an adventurous person. I’ve done brave things like sit in a hairdresser’s chair and told him to go nuts and style my hair as he wished. I have coloured my hair in rainbow hues. Yes, basically I have done a whole bunch of hair stuff. I am a daredevil, you see! But that is all in the past. I was young and invincible. Now, I am old and invisible.

It’s hard to have new experiences in your mid 30s. Especially if you’re doing the whole married-responsible-holding-a-job routine. Today, I stepped out of my comfort zone and did something I have always dreaded. Frankly, I was a little scared, a little embarrassed and a little weirded out by this whole thing. I have always been ambivalent towards people who do this particular thing – I half admire them and half pity them.

Once I decided to do it, I had to do it. That’s how I roll. To prepare myself for this mission, I stress ate the perfect amount. I thought of all the horrible scenarios and of all the things that could go wrong. May be I would bump into the bitchy girls from my school and they’d look at me and snicker not quite subtly. May be I would be the only person who’d come alone and people would secretly post pictures of me on Instagram with the hashtags #loser #desperatewoman #whatswrongwithher. I had to have a few bites of chocolate cake to calm myself down.

I finally got into the car. I put on Alicia Keys’ “Girl on Fire,” rolled down the windows and sang at the top of my lungs. It worked. By the time the song ended and I pulled into the parking lot, I was feeling courageous. As I walked towards the door, I noticed the swag in my step and the confidence in my posture. The place was kinda packed with people as expected on a Friday evening, but nobody seemed to notice me; I am used to it – women in their 30s who are not overtly sexy are invisible! I bought me some snacks and the bored server didn’t even blink as I bought my small popcorn and small drink. Did I not mention, I went to the movies by myself? Wellll…I went to the movies today…BY MYSELF. It’s a big deal, ok!

I've kept the stub as a souvenir!

I’ve kept the stub as a souvenir!

As I walked into the theater, I noticed that there were a lot of people sitting alone in the 5th row from the bottom. The rows behind were packed, so I walked to this particular row. I tried not to notice the creepy old guy and the woman with the missing tooth who smelled like vodka and puke. Once the lights went out, I felt more relaxed. I watched “Trainwreck,” and I had expected that I would laugh quietly in my head, but damn you Amy Schumer; she had me laughing so hard that I could hear the echoes of my laughter! I snorted with glee at some points! It was fuckin’ hilarious! Yes, I swear. All the time. See, I am feeling so brave! I don’t care that my sweet and innocent father and my prim-and-proper mother-in-law and her gang of friends will read this!

I feel invigorated and fearless. I AM fearless. I just watched a movie ALL BY MYSELF. I can do anything I want. Tomorrow, I am going to watch Ant Man. I live on the edge!

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Posted in: attitude