Today I felt a little jealous of someone who comes to my dance class, simply because she dances well. She is very nice to me and it makes me not like her even more. As a person, I am trying to compete less with others, and encourage myself to do better at the things I am involved in. I am also trying to keep things in perspective and appreciate myself for my good qualities/habits/traits. Often I find, I am quite self-aware and great at critiquing myself to the right level, but I am not always good at recognizing how much of myself I take for granted. Tonight before I go to bed, I just wanted to acknowledge all that I do for myself. So much of my self worth comes from being a social worker or a self-proclaimed crusader for social justice. But I need to acknowledge all the things about me FOR ME.
1. I work hard to constantly better myself. (In 2014, I have managed to walk away from almost every fight and come back with a more toned down and suitable response. It has enhanced my communication skills and improved my marriage tremendously.)
2. I have realistic expectations of myself. (For example, I allow myself to NOT like people.)
3. I am a good dancer. Not the best, but I am pretty good. (I always wanted to learn Kathak. At the age of 28, I enrolled myself in a class. I had to start from scratch in Toronto, but I have been doing it, and slowly rebuilding my skills.)
4. I have a great sense of humour and I am F.U.N! (Needs no explanation! Come hang out with me!)
5. I am a good cook even though I hate cooking. (You gotta have my dal! Yummm.)
6. I write well. (I like my blog. I feel it has something for everyone. My USP or Unique Selling Point is that I write posts which make people think.)
7. I like and respect myself. (I have learnt that when you like yourself, you teach others to respect you.)
8. I can accept the fact that some people hate me. (I can live with it without giving it a second thought. There were people in my school in Toronto who hated my guts and used my name as an insult! HA HA.)
9. I have gotten good at dealing with family. (I communicate what I need clearly. When I get upset and hang up on my dad, I call back and apologize. I have realistic expectations of them.)
10. I always rise when I fall. I never give up on myself. (I have had to re-evaluate my entire value system and parameters for success in the last few years. I have been down and out, but never off.)
I am going to bed extremely tired, but happy. I am glad I did this. When I began writing, I found it hard to even think of a few. Now, there’s a lot more I want to put on there. What are the top 10 things you love about yourself, and when was the last time you acknowledged yourself for it?
Shraddha mehta
December 3, 2014
V nice. Makes me think of reasons why i should like myself too. 🙂
Henri
December 3, 2014
Yes! I was hoping you’d see this and feel inspired. Share it with me, if not with others. You totally should have a blog.
Snehal
December 3, 2014
You inspire me to write, Ekta!! I always write in my mind, but it never gets onto paper. When I read your blog, I can feel the happiness and satisfaction that comes from writing. So here’s my resolution – WRITE!!
Btw, this post is simple and beautiful – as always!
Henri
December 3, 2014
Yes, you totally should have a blog too!! Write! Let’s take a blog challenge together if you want!
Snehal
January 4, 2015
Hey Ekta, I got around reading your reply only now. The blog challenge idea just gave me goosebumps 🙂 How do you we take this ahead?
Adi
December 3, 2014
Beautiful exercise. Made me think too I’m good at giving second chances, again and again, with as much faith.
Henri
December 3, 2014
Aditi, that’s amazing! In fact, I’ve seen you do that for yourself and in relation to others. It’s a fabulous quality. I can do that for myself, for others…NO WAY.
Delnaz
December 3, 2014
Absolutely wonderful !!
Henri
December 3, 2014
Thank you! I’ve realized that self-esteem that comes from others is so limited and shaky. The bit that comes from within stays the longest.
Sid
December 3, 2014
I vouch wholeheartedly for #1 and #10..not that the others aren’t true..just feel most strongly about these.
Henri
December 3, 2014
Thank you baby! You are also awesome…ummmma.
Diya George
December 3, 2014
I really should make a list for myself!
Henri
December 3, 2014
Yes, Diya! There’s a lot about you that I admire. Let’s see if you recognize those things about YOU!
Diya George
December 3, 2014
You just made my day Ekta!!!:-) but I will definitely pen them down.
Carkey Byandana
December 3, 2014
aww,i’ll take this to the next day too! will boost my self esteem the whole day tmrw as well!
Henri
December 3, 2014
Perfect. I also need to practice this more often.
MMansi
December 4, 2014
Great piece of writing, Ekta. Reminds me of “Main apni favorite hoon”. This is important because as you rightly said if you don’t love yourself, people never will. Keep the posts coming, we love your blog too!
Henri
December 4, 2014
Oh yes! I remember hearing that line and was wondering why so many people thought it was funny! I guess loving oneself is considered vain in most cultures; one’s self-worth apparently needs to come from wealth, status, education, children and their accomplishments, etc. It’s ridiculous. Each one of us is worth something! On a lighter note, I made this somewhat funny line, “I am not immodest, I am just self-aware!” HA HA. I am trying to reduce my FB time and put it in my blog. So far it has worked well. Let’s see how long I can continue it.
theglasslantern
January 2, 2015
As always a great post. I spent/ spend a lot of time worrying about what other people think to the detriment of my own health. I’m still not sure about the loving yourself idea as it feels slightly arrogant but I think it’s about realising that you are good enough and not giving yourself such a hard time?
Henri
January 2, 2015
I agree…self-love is different from arrogance. The idea of loving onself is simply to increase one’s self awareness and stand up for oneself. Arrogance usually involves making others feel bad or being over confident. Self-love, to me, seems like understanding and accepting onself…even when no one else will or can 🙂